To birth at home or not to birth at home?

Tony and I decided to have a  home birth!!  .... .....  hum.... now we just have to go through it. lol
I had Dr appointment on Tuesday. It turns out that the appointment was to collect information to get a chart together to send up to my a military ob. but since we've decided to do a home birth i canceled it (and I prefer a civilian dr anyhow). I switched my Insurance from tricare prime to tricare standard so i wouldn't need a referral. I had called Birthcare, A group of midwives that works out of Alexandria VA, they Scheduled an appointment for me for May 3rd. since that was about a month from now (a long time if your worried)  I called my old ob and went in to get blood work done and I scheduled my first Ultrasound for april 14! how exciting. and after I got home I called birthcare again today and asked for something earlier and they scheduled me for the 18th. I am worried... birthcare even though they do home births you dont see only one midwife... you see several and when delivery time comes you dont even really get to choose. to me thats a total turn off. almost the whole point is to be comfortable with the person thats assisting you. So im not too excited. and another thing. I like my normal OB dr a lot. Shes nice, understanding, and I never feel rushed and she delivers in a hospital really close to home. Im conflicted. I called another midwife (Joey from Sacred Journey) thats farther but she would work closely with me. Im excited to see if she would help me ... but I am worried if i should even be thinking of doing this thing at home. the whole thing is a tough decision. I want to have this baby naturally and preferably at home. with my husband and son and maybe an extra doula. I didnt have a negative experience at the hospital the first time like some people ( but then again what the heck did i know back then i was only 18). but I would like things differently I want to sit in my rocking chair. walk around. take a bath sit on my yoga ball.or meditate. light candles and sit in the dark,  i want to be listening to oldies and relaxing for the first 8 centimeters. basically i just want comforting things to make things go by easier. I dont know but i am envisioning it so strongly maybe i shouldn't even question it....... but then I remember the pain lol.... yay... what if i'm a weenie? lol  what if i really need medication. what if the baby wants to take 16 hrs like johnny did. Im just scared and worried.
I guess this isnt really a good blog. since im just ranting. but there it is.